Sureal

That word really describes the past few days for me. Granted I got drunk wednesday after I got let go and got really fucked helping my Irish friends celebrate St. Patty's day it's still been very strange. I went to work at the same company for 6 years and although really did hate it, it became something that was very familiar and something that was comfortable. I could pretty much do as I pleased for most of the time and not many people really knew what I did. I liked it that way and in retrospect the fact that no one knew what I did really meant no one knew if I was doing a good job or if it was really that important.

I never got let go for performance reasons, the reason I was told was that it was because they were planning on restructuring. Be it restructuring or be it budgetary I still think that I got let go because I got paid a lot to do soemthing that not a great many people knew was necessary. I still think they'll need a position similar to what I did but they could probably farm it out or get consultants to do it.

So why the sureal past few days? Well 6 years just eneded really quickly in pretty much a heartbeat... that it it's own right will cause a person to take a moment and pause. That's what I've been doing. I've been replaying the whole scenario in my head numerous times and for as much as I really want to be pissed at my old boss and the company I'm not. I'm really starting to not care about the whole deal. I got the best possible alternative... since i didn't like my job I'm now being paid to look for work and I never got fired I got let go for restructuring reasons and I beleive when i go drop off my package documents I get a nice reference letter. So in the end this isn't a bad thing; I don't hold it against them though the sudden shock was a bit much. I think they could have done it much better than they did but that's life. You deal and you move on.

I guess that's what tomorrow is... the beginning of moving on.